Mirrors

She is looking in the mirror tonight ...harsh reality is all she sees: lines of tiredness on her face -a forced smile is hard to come by. Behind her eyes are tears yet to be shed, and she knows she can't let them slip down her cheeks until she's alone in the darkness of her room in her empty bed, where her pillow greets them every night. Some say she's strong, but the dress she wears feels like loneliness. Her silent prayers unspoken: "Oh, Poppa God, just let me know You are here, and hold me tight because I can't go on like this tonight. Send your angels to help me find my way." She straightens herself up, sighs, and walks out the door to make dinner for her kids. "Poppa, help me tonight."
(To be continued. My Story, my Heart, my Testimony. written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved.)

A Moment

Clear memories remind me of that September fall day when the truth hit me, and I realized that he had not only abandoned me, but he had left me for another woman, a woman who was already married to someone else. I can still vividly recall the sobs of brokenness that literally took my breath away as I crumpled to the floor. The pain of emotions was like drowning in tidal waves, sending my soul crashing down again and again with no comfort or relief. Now, though, I can see that Poppa God was there with me the whole time...Ruby's Story.
(To be continued) ~Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 all Rights Reserved.
 Join me as I share my story, my heart, my testimony. Need prayer or support? Join us at: Ruby Wives

In The Fog

In the silence, in the moment when I feel everything is too foggy and I can't seem to see hope through the trees of my soul, I hold on -even if all I can do is whisper His name: "Jesus". It feels cold, it feels lonely, and I'm tired of bravely smiling everyday. But I hold on...hold on even if I see no difference and no change in the situation, and when I feel I am not heard -help me. Help me. Help me to trust, and when I'm so tired, let me fall into Your everlasting arms. Heavenly Father, today I come before You, and I remind myself to give You honor and praise for all You have done for me. Thank You for all the times You have brought me through, and now, as I walk through a time of fog and I can't seem to see my way, I trust in You to complete what You have purposed and planned for my life. Your ways are higher than mine, and I choose at this moment to trust You to help me accomplish all that You have promised to do through me. I don't fully understand why this waiting time has been so long, but You will perfect everything that concerns me. I hold fast to Your love. I hold fast to Your word that is forever and unchanging. I love You, Poppa God, and I delight in You and I know that You will give me the desires of my heart. In Jesus' name, the Name that is written on my heart for eternity, Amen. ♥ Written by Jenny Williams Copyright 2012 All rights reserved. Please share for encouragement purposes only.

Be At Rest

"LORD, You have assigned me my portion and my cup. You have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me. Even at night my heart instructs me. I have set the LORD always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken." Psalm 16:5-8

God is so good that even while we are sleeping, He instructs our hearts. I woke up this morning just feeling a deep sense of "Rest". I share this for someone who might need it. I personally have done what I can do regarding certain situations and prayers that I have prayed. I'm at a place of restfulness and peace, and I know this is the Holy Spirit, because I generally am not like that. Being at complete rest does not mean you have given up, but that you are in complete rest knowing He has it in hand. ♥ Bless the Lord, Oh my soul and all that is within me, Bless His Holy name. I was battling restlessness and the frustrations of not getting what I was praying for. His mercy is so good, because He let me know He has it "all" and I don't need to fret anymore about these circumstances that have been pressing on me. He has heard me and He has it taken care of it "all". Psalm 116:7 "Let my soul be at rest again, for the LORD has been good to me." Being at rest also means trust. He loves it when we trust Him. ♥ Trust is precious. It's intimate. It's sacred. It's honorable. Poppa God, I trust You. Heavenly Father, I come before you in reverence and with thanksgiving. I delight in You, and I know and trust that You have heard my prayers and my heart's cry. I lay myself in sweet rest in Your lap, knowing that You have all these concerns and worries in Your hands. I rest with expectation. I am covered and wrapped in Your blanket of grace and love. I rest in Your shadows. I rest under Your wings. I rest in Your name for You are with me. Great is your faithfulness, O God. Your peace is upon me! Written By Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives, Copyright 2012 All rights reserved. Scriptures from NIV and New Living Translation. Please feel free to share for encouragement purposes only.

31 Days of Walking In Wisdom (Day 1)

As I was praying for women and their marriages, I felt in my heart that there had to be more than just prayer alone. Prayer is essential, but I believe that there should be action with faith as well. I asked God, "Please show me how to get the keys to a man's heart." Many wives have found their husbands have locked the door of the hearts from their wives. RESPECT AND HONOR is what men need and desire. If they don't have this from their wife- Their walls go up. Getting wisdom and understanding is the key to unlock solutions to problems. Please join us for the month of October: 31 Days of Walking in Wisdom. Every day we will be reading a chapter of Proverbs. Wisdom truly is the key to unlock solutions to the problems you may have in your life. ♥ Day 1: Read chapter 1 of Proverbs: Reflect: What have you found wisdom to be ? What does wisdom provide ? Proverbs chapter 1 and footnotes are from NIV Version Bible Purpose and Theme 1 The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel: 2 for gaining wisdom and instruction; for understanding words of insight;3 for receiving instruction in prudent behavior, doing what is right and just and fair;4 for giving prudence to those who are simple,[a] knowledge and discretion to the young—5 let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance—6 for understanding proverbs and parables, the sayings and riddles of the wise.[b] 7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools[c] despise wisdom and instruction. Prologue: Exhortations to Embrace WisdomWarning Against the Invitation of Sinful Men 8 Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.9 They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck. 10 My son, if sinful men entice you, do not give in to them.11 If they say, “Come along with us; let’s lie in wait for innocent blood, let’s ambush some harmless soul;12 let’s swallow them alive, like the grave, and whole, like those who go down to the pit;13 we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder;14 cast lots with us; we will all share the loot”—15 my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths;16 for their feet rush into evil, they are swift to shed blood.17 How useless to spread a net where every bird can see it!18 These men lie in wait for their own blood; they ambush only themselves!19 Such are the paths of all who go after ill-gotten gain; it takes away the life of those who get it. Wisdom’s Rebuke 20 Out in the open wisdom calls aloud, she raises her voice in the public square;21 on top of the wall[d] she cries out, at the city gate she makes her speech: 22 “How long will you who are simple love your simple ways? How long will mockers delight in mockery and fools hate knowledge?23 Repent at my rebuke! Then I will pour out my thoughts to you, I will make known to you my teachings.24 But since you refuse to listen when I call and no one pays attention when I stretch out my hand,25 since you disregard all my advice and do not accept my rebuke,26 I in turn will laugh when disaster strikes you; I will mock when calamity overtakes you—27 when calamity overtakes you like a storm, when disaster sweeps over you like a whirlwind, when distress and trouble overwhelm you. 28 “Then they will call to me but I will not answer; they will look for me but will not find me,29 since they hated knowledge and did not choose to fear the Lord.30 Since they would not accept my advice and spurned my rebuke,31 they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes.32 For the waywardness of the simple will kill them, and the complacency of fools will destroy them;33 but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm.” Footnotes: 1.Proverbs 1:4 The Hebrew word rendered simple in Proverbs denotes a person who is gullible, without moral direction and inclined to evil. 2.Proverbs 1:6 Or understanding a proverb, namely, a parable, / and the sayings of the wise, their riddles 3.Proverbs 1:7 The Hebrew words rendered fool in Proverbs, and often elsewhere in the Old Testament, denote a person who is morally deficient. 4.Proverbs 1:21 Septuagint; Hebrew / at noisy street corners

Key To A Man's Heart

Wives, one thing Poppa God has been speaking to me about as a solution for some women, is learning how to find the key to a man's heart -specifically your man. Many husbands, for various reasons, have shut the doors of their hearts toward their wives and locked them. They feel they have been dishonored or disrespected. Their pride has been hurt, and their fear of failure has been amplified because their wives have lost sight of how to show their love and respect in a Godly way. Having access to your husband's heart again can open opportunities for healing in your marriage if it's strained. Prayer is important, always continue to pray. This will bring the kind of wisdom that will reveal a solution. James 1:5 "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you."  Be careful. It's possible to pray and pray until you are blue in the face, but get nowhere in repairing your marriage. First, do some reflection and think about your actions. Try and remember the tone or words you have used when speaking with your husband. Think about if you, out of frustration or anger, have dishonored or disrespected him. How do you make your husband feel in your presence? Do ridicule him, belittle him, or criticize his efforts? Do you nag and complain about your home, money, car, or any other thing your husband has worked for to provide you and your children with? Have you talked dirt about him behind his back? Have you made remarks such as "You always do this!", or "You never do that!" Have you publicly made jokes about your husband in front of others? Even if your husband laughed it off, it may have hurt him deeper than you realized. These things tear husbands down. Men were created to feel honored and respected. This is how God made them. A man who feels undervalued, unappreciated, and degraded will look for validation elsewhere if you, as a wife, have not provided this for him. What may seem like little comments, valid complaints, etc., may have gotten him to build that wall around his heart, brick by brick. The injury of a man's pride is really his manhood being stripped away. Over time, these things can cause his heart to be hardened, and his walls to go up. A husband will grow tired of feeling low about himself as a man. When a man feels emotionally connected with a woman, he will desire to be near her and to stay by her side. This is why a man will sometimes go after another woman and have an affair, because she knows how to touch his heart emotionally and she makes him feel good about himself. It's not always about sex, or that the other woman is prettier than you -it's how she makes him feel, but there are always solutions to life's problems. Simply put, YOU need the key to HIS heart! As Dr. Mike Murdock states:  "Men desire to have a 'nest' with no thorns." As wives, we should create our homes to be a safe refuge from the "thorns" of life.   Proverbs 14:1 "The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." In other words, your words and your actions have a large part in creating the environment of your home and marriage. I share this not to place blame, or to help make excuses as to why a husband has walked away. I know that you most likely feel that you have valid reasons for the actions, reactions, and words you may have said to him at times -he may have disappointed you or hurt your feelings too, but it takes two to build a healthy marriage, and you knowing your role as a wife will help. If you can walk in wisdom and apply God's principles of how to show honor and respect, it can help immensely. I must say, search your heart and ask God if this might be something you have unknowingly done. Please know that I share from experience and my own personal failures. I encourage wives to ask the Lord to help tear down the walls that have been built, and begin learning to build up your husbands with new found honor and respect. Find the key to his heart so YOU can unlock the door. Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved Please feel free to share for encouragement purposes only. God bless.
(Quoted scriptures are from the NIV Bible Translation.)

Encouragement For Husbands

Husbands, have you lost the art of romancing your wife? Has it been a while since you've experienced passion in your relationship? Is it cold...like a fridge...in the bedroom? Does your wife turn you down intimately? Women were created and wired to be cherished and feel secure in their relationship with their husbands. Do you cherish her? She needs to feel this from you. When she does, she responds to your sexual needs, because she will feel emotionally connected to you. Sex starts outside of the bedroom for a woman. Let me repeat that one... sex starts outside of the bedroom for a woman! She needs to feel valued, and not as a sexual object or conquest. She needs to feel she is beautiful to you. She needs to be touched and caressed outside of the bedroom. She needs to be wined and dined. Do you make the effort to continue to court her (date her) even after the wedding day?  This is a forever thing that husbands need to do for their wives. Ephesians 5:28 "In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself." Have you given her a special gift just for the sake of making her smile? Have you danced with her in the living room? Reflect on this: what did you do to win her heart before you were married? A wise man knows that the responsibility of a husband is to romance her every day. This is "cherishing" her. She needs to know she is your prize that you love. She needs to know that you value her. Some guys have a hard time being romantic, but there are always ideas in books, on the internet, etc. If you have neglected this area in your marriage, ask God for wisdom on how to warm your wife's heart again. Ask Him to give you the key to her heart. Wisdom is available for you. Start romancing her with little unexpected things. Show her your love. Woo her heart again. Don't bring up the past, just make the future better. It's the little things a man does that capture a woman's heart. God has the solutions. Read the book "Song of Solomon" in the Bible. It's a blueprint for romance. God made women with a need to feel cherished and romanced. If you haven't told her she's beautiful in a while, tell her again -and again. If she comes back with a nasty comment or remark, ignore it. Somehow along the way her heart was injured and her walls went up. Most likely because she felt undervalued and that she was no longer cherished, but there is hope. Be gently persistent, because she may no longer be used to being romanced by you. If you keep finding creative ways to encourage her with your acts of kindness and love, she will melt for you again. Song of Solomon 1:2-3 "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— for your love is more delightful than wine. Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out." Praying for you, men. Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives, Copyright 2012. All rights reserved. Please enjoy and feel free to share for encouragement purposes only. Scriptures are from NIV Bible translation.

A Love Letter to All Brides

To the Bride who doesn't feel loved anymore...to the Bride who feels lost and alone in her marriage...to the Bride who feels like she is holding her family together alone...to the Bride who has been betrayed by the one she loves...to the Bride who has received the ultimate betrayal: being traded for another woman...to the Bride who soaks her pillow with tears every night...to the Bride who keeps a brave smile on her face even though every day is a struggle to get through...to the Bride who feels she can't ask for help because she feels embarrassment and shame...to the Bride who wonders, "What's wrong with me and why doesn't he love me anymore? What did I do wrong?"...to the Bride who feels her fairy tale dreams have been shredded to pieces along with her heart...to the Bride who has been lied to, cheated on, used, or abused...to the Bride who feels like she is competing with her husband's addictions: alcohol, drugs, pornography, or gambling -and waits to be loved more than these things...to the Bride who has tried everything to fix her marriage and feels tired and weary...to the Bride who receives no love or affection from the man who promised to be her lover, friend, protector, and provider...to the Bride who feels uncherished, unvalued, or unromanced...to the Bride who is facing unwanted divorce or separation from the love of her life...to the Bride who has been verbally abused with cruel words spoken so harshly, she feels like she can't escape from the pain of the words that have become thorns in her heart...to the Bride who worries about how to pay the bills or put food on the table for her children...to the Bride who struggles daily with physical pain and illness but still tries to make the best of it...to the Bride whose husband has had to leave her to serve his country, and she doesn't know if her soldier is ever coming back...to the Bride who doesn't feel good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, sexy enough, or strong enough -the answer is really so simple, beloved. A beautiful Bride you will always be to Jesus, and He wants you to know this: He understands your pain, your struggles, and your tears. He has been broken and betrayed by those He loved. He was beaten, abused, forgotten, and ridiculed. He knows, and He wants to hold you and carefully, gently heal your wounded heart. He loves you not based on what you do or don't do, He sees you as His beautiful, stain-free, spotless bride. He loves you...always. He won't leave you or abandon you. He will wipe your tear stained face, and He will not forget. "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book" Psalms 56:8. You are treasured in His heart and He sees you as the "Apple of His Eye". He celebrates you, He adores you, He cares for you, and He will be there for you. Let Him hold you when no one else will. Beloved, you are His Bride for eternity. These present circumstances will fade away, but His love for you will remain the same. "For I know the plans I have for  you." says the Lord, "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope ." Jeremiah 29:11. Written By Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved. Please feel free to share for encouragement purposes only. God bless.

This is My Prayer For You

bear with me

trying to iron out some kinks

Season Of Change

Have you been through the dark valley? Have you been in a drought of joy or peace? Have you suffered a season of brokenness and tears? Has it seemed to last so long that you feel like it's never going to change? There is a time for all seasons under heaven to change. Your time will come. My life is proof of this. I went through a very long dark night of the soul and I have found His grace has sustained me and brought me through. I wrote this spontaneous song in the shower:

He gives me His song of deliverance, His love song of praise. 

He will give you one too. Hold on, Beloved. 

Your time of joy will come, I'm praying for you.

The season of change is here, Love surrounding me..

 His joy has been my strength.

 The pain and suffering are like leaves that are falling 

and all that is left are Your promises that remain. 

In You I have found that I have nothing lacking. 

In You I have all that I have ever need of. 

The wind of Your spirit is swirling around me

 blowing away all the pain and the shame.. 

Your love is sweet and thick on me like honey,

 and dripping is Your mercy and favor on my face. 

 Your grace -double grace is now falling like rain. 

All those who misunderstood and perhaps misjudged me 

are blessing me in your glorious name. 

Through it all I have found You to be faithful and true. 

The air is sweet and Your breath I feel in this place. 

In the dark night You walked me through. 

You never left my side.

Jesus, Your joy is mine and I'm forever grateful and dancing this time.

 My tears are dried and my suffering is falling like leaves and are blown away

and all that is left are your promises that remain. Copyright 2012, Jenny Williams.

Words Are Powerful- What Are you Saying?

Psalm 19:14 "May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer." One of the greatest pieces of wisdom that can change things is knowing how much power is in your words. What you speak to yourself, your husband or wife, your children and even to your situations, can and will come to be. Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit." Everything God accomplishes is by speaking. There are many scriptures in the Bible about this very thing. What you speak will come to pass, whether good or bad, so choose wisely. Ephesians 4:29 "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." At the end of our lives every idle word we have spoken will be taken accounted for. 1 Samuel 2:3 "Do not keep talking so proudly or let your mouth speak such arrogance, for the LORD is a God who knows, and by him deeds are weighed." WOW. How many idle words have I spoken in my life? When you are upset with your spouse do you say things like, "You never listen to me... You always..." These words are negative seeds and yes, they will grow and produce a fruit. Job 15:6 "Your own mouth condemns you, not mine; your own lips testify against you."  Psalm 119:103 "How sweet are Your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!"  Proverbs 4:24 "Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips."  Proverbs 6:2 "you have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth." So, dear friends, remember to always be mindful of what you say. Psalm 119:43 "Never take Your word of truth from my mouth, for I have put my hope in Your laws." 

Reflecting back (God Was Here The Whole Time)

I was reading over some of my old writings and came across this one. So much has happened since that day. I remember how broken and raw I was back then, after my husband of nearly 13 years walked out on God and me. I have come a long way. Poppa God has done so much heart surgery on me. Reading this old post reminds me of His faithfulness and the strength He has been to me all this time. I'm no longer heartbroken. I no longer feel the need to have the attention of any man. Instead, I feel contentment. I feel humbled and honored and happy to be helping others on their journeys of healing as well. As I surrendered my heart's desires on the altar, He placed an all consuming passion to encourage wives daily; to stand in the gap in prayer for them, and to share the wisdom and treasures I have gathered along the way. His love for marriage has been a blazing fire in my heart. God has been so good to me even through the thousands of tears I've shed. He is faithful. Now our ministry is growing, marriages are being healed, lives are being transformed, and all I can say is to God be the glory and oh, how all this pain and suffering has been worth it in the end. I can't wait to share my entire story -to encourage other women and let them know that God is in control and that He makes everything beautiful in His timing -even the ashes of our lives, the mistakes we make, and the struggles we've endured. Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. 

September 24 2010 "ME" by Jenny Williams:  I am.. silly, funny, loving, creative, sweet, passionate. I want.. to make a positive difference in people's lives, to love and be loved, to live the potential God has created in me. I have.. the best friends, the most incredible family, and a God who never fails. I wish.. that I didn't have to go through this season of my life. I hate.. judgmental people, disappointing someone, selfishness, seeing children abused or neglected. I fear.. not being able to accomplish what I was meant to do, being rejected again. I hear.. the sound of country music in my head. I search.. for the answers to my "whys", but know I won't get them. I wonder.. if God really has a plan for me in all of this. I wonder about the "what ifs". I regret.. I choose to not regret, but to learn life's lesson from this journey I'm on. I love.. my beautiful kids, my true friends, my family, and My Lord and Savior. I ache.. to be held, to be comforted, for this pain to go away. I ache for brighter days. I ache for someone I love. I always.. choose God. I may mess up, I may stumble, I may get lost sometimes -I'll never be perfect, but I'll always belong to God. I usually.. notice the little things: sights, smells, sounds, textures... I experience everything. I am not.. I may be broken and hurt right now, BUT I'M NOT DESTROYED, and I will be stronger and better than before. I dance.. in the rain, when snow flakes are falling, in my living room with my babies. I sing.. in the shower, to my kids, to the ones I love, in the car, silly and out of tune..lol. I never.. want to be hurt again like this. I rarely.. refuse to help someone who is hurting or needs encouragement. I cry.. a lot lately -morning, noon, and night, but it's getting better. I never thought a human could have so many tears. I am not always.. going to hurt like this. It will get better. I lose.. my self confidence when I place it in other people's hands, may I never do that again! I've discovered something in all of this: I like myself -I love myself -I like who I am; my quirky personality, my curvy body, I like myself the way I am. If I'm not good enough for a man than too bad for him. I'm confused.. as to why he doesn't love me anymore. I need.. to keep moving, keep living, keep loving, keep trusting God. I can do this. I should.. be thankful for every blessing, every prayer, every blissful moment, because in a moment it can all be lost or taken away. I dream.. of seeing my dreams fulfilled, brokenness turned whole, with love and laughter.

One Of Those Days

Sometimes I just want comfort, because the ache of missing someone is so great. I just don't want to get out of bed, because the thoughts haunt and linger like an old friend, and I wonder if they remember me. Sometimes I just don’t want to fake a smile, because the emotions are just way too close to the surface and it feels like I’m truly at the breaking point of a tear slipping down. No, thank you. I have come this far. So I just want to eat some chocolate, or maybe a comforting gourmet cheese sandwich with soup; but please, please don’t drag me anywhere. I’m just tired, very tired. I know this temporary feeling will pass just like a quick little rain shower. I’m not going backward, I refuse to do that. I’m going forward, if only someone could hold me and not say a word. Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012. All rights reserved.

"Don't Have Love" (Official Music Video) - Christian singer Holly Starr:...

Jason Mraz - I Won't Give Up (Lyric Video)

Good Morning, Poppa God

Being a mom, a wife, a friend, a minister of the gospel, a chauffeur, a housekeeper, and everything else we women tend to be, we must always make time for God. He should get special attention, whether it's early in the morning before the sun rises, or in the pale moonlight while everyone in the house sleeps. Spend time with the Lord. Read a passage of His word. Listen to worship music and let the cares of your day wash away. Speak to Him when you're in the shower, or waiting for the light to turn green at an intersection. Live a lifestyle of chatting with Him throughout the day. It's not about how much time, but rather quality time. He has things He wants to say to you. He loves to whisper, "I love yous" in your ear. You just need to be listening with your heart. We women get so busy. We must realize that Mary in the Bible had it so right when she stopped in the middle of her busyness and just sat at His feet. Martha missed out because she was too concerned with all the work that needed to be done. Look for those moments in between the "Mommy, Mommys". Learn to teach your kids that sometimes you need quiet time and that they can play quietly or read a book while you're having prayer time. I used to sit in my rocking chair when my kids were little. They knew this meant Mama wasn't to be disturbed while praying. This also sets the stage for your kids to grow in good habits of spending time with God. We all have our seasons and times in our lives to change as our family life changes. Even if its 10 minutes or one hour, just make it a valuable, cherished time of soaking in God's presence. He is longing for us. He delights in us talking to Him throughout the day.

Even when others walk out in your life...His love never runs out on you. Kristian Stanfill - One Thing Remains - Passion 2012

How To Make Your Home A Sanctuary

We as wives have the ability to set the tone and mood of our home. It is a God given privilege and honor that He has given us this ability. Have you ever noticed the saying, "If the wife ain't happy then no one is?" It's true, and it's up to us to create a sanctuary in our homes for our husbands and children. How do we do this?        

1. The number one thing is our attitude and our tongue. Our voices usually will reflect what our mood is. Speaking harshly, nagging, yelling, critical words -all of these can make a home feel like a war zone instead of a soft place to land. The Bible says, (Proverbs 21:9) "Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife." Men especially cannot stand someone who nags or is repetitively complaining. It naturally turns on their signal jammer to tune you out, so you're really not winning when you nag. The best thing to do is to mention something once and then go to prayer about the issue, if you are not getting the response you desire of your husband. Also, Proverbs 15:1 says this: "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." How we answer or how we respond with our mouths makes a difference.
2. Remove chaos and clutter. This is an area I always need to work on. Is your house messy and full of piles of stuff? Proverbs 31:27 "She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness." In today's translation that would mean housekeeping. Your house doesn't have to be spotless. I know with small children it can be very challenging, but are there stacks of things that need to be donated to the thrift store? If you don't use it on a regular basis then I suggest either storing it in the garage or donating it to a local charity. Men do NOT like to come home to a huge mess especially after working hard all day. Who does? If you feel uptight or anxious in your house, you may need to do some spring cleaning. Get the family involved and spruce things up. Your bedroom should be the best room of your house: peaceful and clean -a relaxing haven. Think of it as your "love" den. Ask your husband if he likes the bedroom? Listen to him if he complains that the bedspread has too many flowers or the walls are pink. The colors of your decor should be something you both like. 
3. What's the spiritual tone in the house? What do I mean by that? Are there children fighting and screaming, is everyone not getting along? When the tension is rising this is what you can do: light some candles. It creates a calming feel. Play some worship music. Start praying out loud and ask God to bring His sweet peace and love in your home. Believe me it works! You can actually see a difference with the kids and your own mood. When you know your husband has had a bad day, do this before he gets home. Sometimes I will leave christian music playing on in my home even when I'm out doing errands. It's a great thing to come home to. 
4. I know most women now work outside of the home these days, but if you can master this one thing, do it. When you greet your husband as he walks in the door or as you walk in the door, have a smile on your face and let him know you missed him. Also, Romans 16:16 says "Greet one another with a holy kiss." Plant a nice one on his lips when you leave or come home. Don't go into a full long paragraph of all the troubles or irritations of the day. Let him have a chance to relax and unwind. You can still share what's on your mind, but create a time of enjoying each each first. Husbands are more receptive if you approach things this way. It's how they are wired. Let him know often how much you appreciate that he works hard for the family and that he provides. Praise goes a long way. We all like to feel appreciated. These few things are simple and they can make your living environment nice. Keep your nest a safe and restful refuge. Written by Jenny Williams, Copyright 2011

Being God's Daughter

Being Poppa God's daughter doesn't change, even if we feel like we have totally blown it. Sometimes we feel like we're too much of a mess for God to love us, and we even begin to think no one else can love us either, especially if they really knew us. Going through much pain from my past abuse and abandonment, I know what I'm talking about. Growing up, I had a Dad who didn't pay much attention to me. I would have been a great Daddy's girl. It's just in me. I sometimes fill up with envy when I see young girls with their Dads. Why couldn't I have had that? Mine was there growing up, but not really there emotionally. I didn't get kisses and hugs good night. I didn't get tucked in bed by my Dad. He really didn't participate in my every day life. He was absent from birthday parties and milestones. Always longing for love and affection from my Dad, I tended to attract the wrong attention from the opposite sex. Because of this, I experienced abuse of every kind. I would always settle for less, just hoping to be loved. I didn't sleep around, but I did end up in relationships with unhealthy guys. Being abused mentally and physically. I even ended up marrying at the young age of 18 and living a nightmarish hell-on-earth experience being beaten, choked, fighting over a loaded gun, and my life being threatened. Those images have faded and barely seem real to me anymore, because I did survive and overcome. God was gracious and merciful. He brought me out to the other side. But even after deciding in my heart that I would never allow a man to hit me or to raise a hand to me again, I still would still accept a false love from other men. I traded physical abuse for being mentally and emotionally abused. The pattern would repeat itself, and for some reason, no matter much love I would pour out for the one I loved, I would be abandoned over and over again. I felt like a lost, scared little girl that so badly wanted her Daddy to love her. I let men degrade me and ruin my self confidence and esteem. I felt the pain of criticism when my second husband of thirteen years walked out on me. People at church judged me. I felt dirty, ashamed and embarrassed. I felt not good enough for anyone and wondering if I just plainly deserved to not be loved. At times I think my punishments to myself were worse than any physical blow to my body. Bruises heal up, words are are harder to overcome. Like stubborn permanent scars or tattoos. In all of this, I just wanted and craved to be loved. It's been a long journey of healing. A little at a time...many layers...like an onion. I still at times feel a pain in my heart wishing I could be a Daddy's girl, but I'm now relying on Poppa God to fill that role and hole in my heart. I write this to remind someone: anyone who feels ugly, broken, stained, useless, or abandoned. Even if you gave yourself away to another hoping to be loved. Even if you compromised your boundaries, received the wrong attention from a guy, either willingly or unwillingly, you are still loved. You are still precious. You are still God's daughter and He sees His righteousness in you. He doesn't see your robe or dress as dark, dingy, or tattered. He sees His love and grace as your clothing. Don't let the enemy lie to you. Don't let guilt and shame strip you of being confident in who you are. You are beautiful. You are SO worthy of being loved. And nothing...nothing can separate you from being loved by your Poppa God.

  Psalm 34:5 Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame."  Jeremiah 31:3 "The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: 'I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.'"  Romans 8:38-39 "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  Isaiah 61:10 "I delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels."

Afraid To Love

It can be frightening to love again, especially after someone you cared for, adored, and desired has walked away or betrayed you. Intimacy can be so scary. You want to open up, but you're afraid your love will spill over and be lost or rejected again. God is the only one who won't disappoint. Love is a risk. Love is laying yourself down for another's happiness, it's giving freely and not expecting a forced return. To those who are struggling to rebuild the trust and intimacy, it will happen one step at a time. ♥ There is Hope in Christ's Love. ♥ For the one who has hurt their spouse, be patient. Be willing to accept that trust has to be earned back. ~ Ruby Wives

When You're Weary

God does not need to rely on us to fight. He has all the strength and power to overcome anything, but He does want us to trust Him and believe that He will fight for us. Our circumstances most likely will not change if we're trying to change them with our own abilities. His word says, in 1 Samuel 17:44, "All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD’s, and He will give all of you into our hands.” It's difficult at times to just be still and trust Him that He is working things out. When we struggle and fight, we are really fighting ourselves, making ourselves weary and tired. That's something the enemy wants -for us to be tired, confused, and to lose hope. Burnout is bad, because then you really want to throw in the towel and not trust God. Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Mathew 11:28. Resting in His word and His presence is not giving up, it's trusting. Trust is so important to our Heavenly Father. He wants and desires that from us. If we are not completly relying on Him, it's like were saying His Word is a lie. This would be insulting to Him. Thankfully He knows and understands our human frailty and loves us anyway. Lord, I lay down at your feet everything that concerns me. I ask you for the strength and faith to keep it all in Your hands, and for me to not pick up my worries again. You will perfect that which concerns me. Your eyes are on me and I rest in You alone. Your Word is all I need. Thank you for taking care of what concerns me today. I trust in You and lean not on my own understanding. You will guide and direct my life. Amen.

Bethel Music- Draw Near ft. Jeremy Riddle

Waiting

Waiting on the Lord is not a waste of time. God is eternal and He is not limited by time, for He is the one who created it so we could measure our days and reflect on our memories. Don't lose heart during the time of waiting. Get close -ever so close to His chest and listen to His heartbeat. Waiting does come to an end. God finishes what He has purposed to do in our lives. It's we ourselves that struggle with our human impatience. We let our hopes slip away like a balloon floating way up to the sky and disappears. Good things happen to those who wait upon the Lord: Isaiah 40:31 But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint. Psalm 130:5 I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in His word I put my hope. Psalm 33:18 But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love. Hebrews 11:1 [ Faith in Action ] Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Waiting and hoping go together. If you feel you're on the edge of giving up -don't, because most likely you are about to receive what has been promised. Waiting is a part of life. Each season passes. The seeds in the ground wait for the sunlight to cause them to burst up from the earth and emerge as a plant or flower. It may seem dark while waiting for God to answer, but that does not mean God isn't working out the details in your life. Waiting sometimes can feel extremely lonely. It's a time and opportunity to lean close to your Heavenly Father. At these times it may even feel like God isn't hearing our cries, but keep waiting -keep hoping -keep trusting in His unfailing word. When you have too many tears and you feel like you're swirling in negative thoughts and emotions, remember the enemy wants to make you give up so you will forgo the promises that God has given to you. Don't let your temporary feelings cause you to give up on waiting on God. If you were sitting in a lobby or special designated room to meet the president or some other famous person that was your human hero, you would wait. Because you know that at any moment that person would come walking through the door. You would surely be anticipating and reaching out your hand to greet them. Your answer will come through that door. Just wait. Be strong in the Lord and wait patiently for Him to act.

A Woman Can Rebuild

Does it feel like everything around you, your life, your family, has fallen in disarray or totally apart? Emotionally, it's hard holding it together. You put a brave smile on your face, even though you can barely see through the blur of the thousands of tears you have cried, but you are tired of telling everyone out of politeness that you are "fine" or that "everything is alright" because you just don't want to sound like a negative broken record. Going to church or family functions is sometimes difficult, because it's a painful memory of what used to be. Memories of the love you had haunt you like a ghost. Your knees feel worn and sore from the prayers you have prayed in secret. The hinges on your prayer closet door just may even be squeaking because you have used it so much. You wonder if things are ever going to change, if he will change, if you're getting back together, or if this is the end of the dream of a whole family and marriage.  For the sake of love, you question that heart of yours -if it's is going to ever stop caring for the one who hurt you, rejected you, broke you, used you and maybe even abused you. You cry yourself to sleep at night, and the bed seems so lonely you can almost hear your tears -and it's crying too.....puddles on your pillow. It's been so dark for so long. You ask yourself, "How can I hang on any longer?"  Don't lose heart my friend, my sister in Christ, my hero in my eyes -because your pain is not in vain. God promises to make ALL things work together for good to those who are called according to His great purpose. (from Romans 8:28) Notice GREAT PURPOSE. This pain, this disappointment, this hurdle, this mountain, this flood, this fire, this difficult and tiresome season will come to an end for you. It's not permanent. No matter what happens, the tears will cease. God has not forsaken or abandoned you. He is right beside you, and He will take your brokenness, hurts, fears, disappointments and pains, and turn them into REAL STRENGTH, REAL BEAUTY, and MAKE YOU A NEW WOMAN. His word says, "...and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of His splendor." Isaiah 61:3. This painful time can be turned into beauty if you let Him. Trust Him in this process. He will help you, and what were your ashes, rubble, and heaps of junk, will become a monument to God's amazing goodness...a living testimony of His faithfulness, His grace, and His glory. Psalm 34:5 says, "Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame." Written By Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives  Copyright 2012

Letter To My Wife

Dear Wife of Mine, I know I should have sent this to you sooner- I sometimes don't know how to tell you how I feel. You're the most beautiful thing my eyes get to see every day; and even when I'm away, you are still in my view. You never fade from my sight. I know I don't always tell you what you need to hear. It's hard for me to come up with the words, because I'm a simple man and I have a hard time admitting what I'm feeling. I just want you to know that your my whole world and I never want or need anything else. The creator knew exactly what I needed when He made you. Your smile washes away the struggles of my day. Your laugh makes me feel alive. Being in your arms is like being at home. I feel accepted, wanted and relaxed. Your presence makes me at ease and you are my safe place to land. You let me be me, and you love me anyway. Your voice, your touch, your smell, are always what I long for when I'm away. You are never not on my mind. When I'm busy working and earning a living, I feel it's an honor and a privilege to provide for you, my wife and the beautiful family we made. Face it, girl, you're my whole world. Don't you ever fret or worry as you grow older with age. You are always beautiful to me. I always see you as my bride -every day. Thanks for putting up with me. For loving me in spite of my foolish notions, the mistakes I make, and my weaknesses. I am always learning something valuable from you. I love your heart. You're so gentle and so kind. I have a good woman by my side. There's nothing more I could ever want. You and the kids and God are all I need. Thank you, Baby for making my life better than it could ever be. I love you, always and forever. ~ Love, Your Husband
Written By Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved

I Want My Daddy

Sometimes it feels this world of problems and struggles is just too much to bear. I feel like a little girl with snot running down her nose, hair and clothes all rumpled, tears smeared across my face. My thoughts are racing, "Where's my Daddy? Where has He gone?" I'm searching and looking. Running from room to room. I'm looking for my Daddy so He can pull me up on His lap and tell me it's going to be okay -that He will beat up the bad guys who are chasing me, and give me the feeling and assurance that He will protect me. I can feel Him wiping my tears with the corner of my dress and He is holding me tight. I feel safe and alright. I smell His neck and his scent relaxes me. He tickles me and makes me laugh. I soon forget what troubled me. We're both laughing. And I'm kissing His cheek. He whispers, "What does my baby girl want?" I know that whatever my heart's desire is, He will give me. I can hear my own voice say, "Just hold me close, Daddy. Just hold me a whole lot longer." From Hebrews 13:5,b God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

There Is Always Hope

Do you feel you're losing hope? Are you tired? Do you feel you are hanging by a thread and it's about to break? Do you feel like you have been calling out and you hear nothing but silence to your hearts cries? God's word is true and everlasting. His word is faithful and true. Cling to the hope that you know. Faith, hope and love are all inertwined together -they are your rope to hang onto in times of struggle and pain. Jesus is on the other end of that rope you're holding onto. He is your anchor and He won't let go of you. When you are running low on hope, cry out to Jesus. He will give you more hope, just ask Him for it. Psalm 62:5 Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Psalm 43:5 Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. Psalm 71:5 For you have been my hope, Sovereign LORD, my confidence since my youth. Psalm 119:114 You are my refuge and my shield; I have put my hope in your word. Job 11:18 You will be secure, because there is hope; you will look about you and take your rest in safety. There's always HOPE, my friend.

How To Make A Woman Happy

To the boyfriends, husbands and the someday wanna be's...Here's a few tips :) What makes a woman happy in a relationship ? And what keeps her happy ? NOTICE US: Look her in the eyes. Have you seen it light up or sparkle when she sees you? You are the one who has the ability to turn the twinkle lights in her eyes. If she's delighted, If she's feeling loved. If she adores you- It will show. Notice her thought and input on her outfit. Notice her perfume and mention it. Notice if she's done her hair differently. Always comment and say, "I notice your hair looks different today- I love seeing it up it shows your beautiful neck." Notice her shoes. If you notice anything good about us it makes us feel good. But you have to tell us. It doesn't do anything if you don't say anything. Nothing's worse than getting ready for an evening out- And a man says nothing. Always take notice. The only real way to take notice is to look at us and study us. TREAT US LIKE A LADY ALWAYS: Be an old fashioned guy and treat us like a lady. Not just once in a while, but all the time. Open the doors when entering and leaving any place. Open the car doors for us. Reach for our hand to help us out of a vehicle. Some guys even buckle the seat belt for us- That's sweet and romantic. Pull out the chair for us at the table in public places. Pay for the date when going out. Bring flowers just for the sake of it's a beautiful day. Send flowers to our work place- this makes us feel valuable. Special note: If your woman is not use to being treated this way- Be patient. She may make a silly remark if you haven't done this for her before, but just keep doing these things anyways. We will appreciate it. Don't use foul language in front of us. Don't ever call us a "B"word when angry. BE PROUD OF US: What I mean by that is if you introduce us to someone- Say, "This is my beautiful wife". Compliment what a wonderful wife, mother and person she is. We need to know this often. We feel valued if you are proud of us. Hold our hands in public. When were walking to the car or shopping. Give our hand a little squeeze and smile at us- for no other reason but to just say "Hey, I'm on your side and I love you". Touch the small of our back and guide us gently when were walking into a room of people- WE LOVE THIS. SHOW US YOUR STRENGTH TO US: Be a man and show your strength to us by carrying our packages, groceries, etc. Reach up high for us and get something down for us. Change the light bulbs, take out the trash, change the litter box- Do the unpleasant, smelly chores- Because were a lady. A lady should not have to do those things. Yes, it's old fashioned, but it makes us feel good. Knowing you like being a man for us. Take "hot" things out of the oven so we don't get burned. Again- If you haven't done these things for your woman before- It may take her a while getting use to you doing it. AFFECTION: Give us physical affection without voicing a sexual invitation. Leave it up to her if she wants it to lead to the bedroom. Touch our face, trace our features with your fingers, kiss the top of our head and pull us into your chest. This is endearing and it FEELS GOOD. We feel loved, safe, and secure. Rub our aching legs or feet. Kiss the back of our neck while were doing dishes or cooking. Give us hugs when we look stressed or down. If you do these things- Most likely we will feel loved and often may want to make love to you because we feel cherished and adored. MAKE US FEEL NUMBER ONE: If you spend alot of time on your boat, going golf with the buddies, fishing, watching tv sports all the time- We will feel jealous for your attention. WE dont mind if you do have your man cave time and your stress relieving activities- But if there ever is a day when were sick or we need extra help with the kids or it's a emotional day- Please always be willing to cancel that engagement and choose to be there for us. This gives you huge brownie points :) Also because we know that no matter what were more important than anyone or any thing. This makes us feel secure and valued. when we feel secure we have no problem you going out with the guys or you spending time in your man cave. SEX: Make us feel like your making love to us. Take the time to caress us, explore us, enjoy us. Try to pleasure us before yourself and you will be a happy man in the bedroom. Because the more you appreciate our curves, tell us were sexy and beautiful. It makes us more confident. If were more confident about our bodies- we will be more open and delicious for you. Also remember sex starts outside of the bedroom for us women. This means- You have flirted with us, smiled at us, spoken to us kindly during the day. Help us with the kids or chores- This gives us more energy for you. REMEMBER THE DETAILS: These are important to us. I know it's hard to remember- But take special notes when your woman says she wants something or she admired something in a store. Because then you can surprise us. Nothings more admirable when a man remembers a pair of shoes or perfume his woman wanted and he later brings it home to her. She will feel special and she will feel that you listen to her ! COMMUNICATING WITH US: When talking and listening to her- Always, Always, Always look her in the eyes and face. This makes us feel heard. If your wise you will repeat back what we said just so we know you understand. Example: " What your saying is that you would like for us to go on vacation at the coast and stay at the the hotel we stayed at last ?" The tones you use in your voice when speaking to us. I CANNOT EXPRESS THIS ENOUGH- HARSH TONES HURT US. Don't shout at us when your angry either. Show us respect like you would your boss or aquaintenance. If you are harsh-Then apologize quickly and say it was unacceptable. Work on this area if it's a problem for you. WORDS: Speak sweet "Everythings" to us... Call us sugar, honey, babydoll, babe, georgeous or whatever- But call us sweet things. And tells us were beautiful often !!! We don't get tired of hearing it. Let us know were your whole world. Whisper love words in our ears...Write little love notes or buy love cards. PLAN DATES FOR US...Surprise us. Just take care of the details and hire the baby sitter. Be clever and creative. If your not- then google ideas on the internet. Want a really awesome idea? Buy her a dress, necklace and shoes- Then surprise her with a note saying "I saw this and it reminded me of you and I want to take you out tonight with you wearing this. " The lady at Macy's will think your sweet- YOUR WIFE WILL THINK YOUR AMAZING !!! BE A MAN OF GOD: Pray for us and with us. Lead us to God when there's a problem. Make it a priority to have us go to church together regularly. Live and lead our family in a lifestyle of worship, prayer and walking in God's love daily to us. Nothings more SEXY than a man who is a worshiper and a man of prayer and integrity !!!!!! WE LOVE IT. ALWAYS PURSUE US. THE MAGIC IS YOU NEVER STOP CHASING US. THATS WHAT KEEPS THE ROMANCE AND PASSION ALIVE.
Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives  Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved. Please only share for encouragement purposes.

You Are His Princess

I know abandonment from a father or a husband causes great turmoil to one's self esteem. You just want to feel safe. You want and desire and even crave affection. It's like an endless hole in your heart that just won't go away. This ache won't go away until you fully understand and accept that this hurt and abandonment was NOT your fault. There is nothing you did wrong. You are LOVABLE. Someone else just didn't choose to value you because of their own selfishness, fears, or issues. There's nothing you could do differently to get them to love you, but please know -you are loved beyond measure. You are passionately pursued by your HEAVENLY FATHER. HE IS PROUD OF YOU AND HE IS NOT DISAPPOINTED IN YOU. NOTHING YOU COULD HAVE DONE COULD CAUSE HIM TO STOP LOVING HIS PRINCESS..HIS DAUGHTER....HIS PRIDE AND JOY. You are Daddy's little PRINCESS- ALWAYS ♥ Jeremiah 31:3 The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. Zephaniah 3:17 The LORD your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”

Stormy Weather

Jeremiah 1:8 Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you,” declares the LORD. Sometimes we get caught in a "storm" of life of which we had no warning. We get drenched in the drama of the day. Sometimes we react in a stupid way. Sometimes it feels so fierce, and we wonder if we can recover. It's left our minds confused, our physical bodies tired and drained and our hearts disheartened, but Jesus said, "Do not fear for I am with you". The Lord reaches out His mighty hand and pulls us to safety. I'm praying your storms are swiftly over and that you have a calm knowing in your heart that you are loved and you are saved. May Poppa GOD hold you today.

Coconuts

I have been having a strange, weird fetish, being engulfed in a crazy and insatiable, and indescribable need for coconuts. I have been craving coconut foods, desserts, drinks (they even have coconut tea), perfumes, lotions, shampoo; I crave the smell, the taste and even just looking at the them. My mind wondered if my body was needing a certain nutrient from it. I drank coconut water, ate coconut cake, bought coconut shampoo and lotions and potions (what the heck?) -but let me tell you what Poppa God did through all this: He reminded me that He was going to split open wide the hearts of men that had been hardened like a coconut shell -those husbands and wives who have let the doors to their hearts become closed. He will reveal what is sweet and tender in the things of God, and an intimate love and passion for their spouses again. YES, God uses anything, even coconuts to get our attention! To the one who wanted to give up: His word says anything is possible. He can soften a heart, but that heart has to be seeking and searching Him out. There is hope that He will reveal what is sweet and tender in the things of God, and an intimate love and passion for spouses again. "With this in mind, we constantly pray for you, that our God may make you worthy of His calling, and that by His power He may bring to fruition your every desire for goodness and your every deed prompted by faith. We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in Him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ."  2 Thessalonians 1:11-12 (Notice the word FRUITION) Praise God!

I Love You Like Crazy

I love you....so much it hurts -aches, because you don't choose to love me back. I don't understand this kind of love -to love someone who has hurt me over and over again, but yet I still do. Am I just in love with needing your love and approval? I've questioned myself deeply and the answer is: no. I have learned how to live without your love every time you gave up on us and our dreams. Each time you put thick bricks of isolation around you and wouldn't let me in to your heart or emotions, I learned how to go without. The nights of silently crying and feeling so alone even though you were laying next to me. This kind of love doesn't make sense -love with no return of affection, words of endearment or looks of devotion in your eyes. The only thing I can even grasp and somehow can relate is the love that Jesus had when He died on the cross. His selfless act for all those who rejected Him, hurt Him, betrayed Him. He layed Himself down, because of LOVE -because of His love for us. I can still remember the night God deposited love in my heart for you. I had no idea what the journey would hold; the tears, the pain I would endure having this love for you. I know that Love is a choice, but I also know there are many levels of love. It can go deep -far past the superficial "I needs' and "I wants".... Just as 1 Corinthians 13 states: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."  True love doesn't have a condition (I will only love you " if"- There is no "if" in love-Only "I will"). Jesus didn't choose to die for us if we would clean ourselves up or love Him back. He loved us first knowing we may not love back. This is huge, and honestly, how many couples love like that? How many are committed to loving even if the other is not doing their part. I don't condone physical abuse or living in danger for your life or your children's. I don't mean that we should be a doormat for being beaten, cheated on over and over by sexual or emotional affairs, but I do believe in loving at all times. Crazy!!!!! Not the norm, I suppose. Oh, to be loved like this by the ones we love. Wedding vows used to mean something: laying down ourselves for the other. In good times and in bad, in sickness an in health, for richer or poorer, forsaking all others until our last breath. Husbands come back and choose to do what is right. Wives too. Walk in love, even when you don't feel it. Maybe she's waiting ...waiting for you to be the man and step up to the plate and do what is right. A woman needs to be loved by your actions, not just your words. Maybe she's waiting for you to show her you would be willing to fight for her and the promises you made. You don't have to be perfect, but just be honest and love her with your whole heart. We don't want to share your heart with another, we want to be the only one. A woman who truly loves a man will love him in spite of his weaknesses and failures. She will get on her knees when she sees you going under, and will support you spiritually when you are discouraged. A good woman was meant to be your helpmate and strength beside you -that's how Poppa God intended it. She sees your faults, but encourages you and believes for your future even when you can't yourself. She will forgive you for being a fool, if you're "man" enough to admit that you were wrong and you follow through with making it right. As the Good Book says: "Blessed is the man who finds a good wife. He has found favor with the Lord" A good man will acknowledge he needs her in his life.

Beauty From Brokenness

We are almost half way through the 90 Day Challenge, and still women are joining. Praise God for His awesomeness in our lives. My week was very meaningful, fitful, moving, and even beautiful. A lot happened this week for me and, I believe, for you as well. Thank you so much for your prayers for my healing. Some even fasted for me- God bless you richly for that. There are not enough words to express my love and gratitude for you. I am on the way to being healed. He is healing me -it's a beautiful process. I know He is making a way even when there seemed to be no way. One thing pivotal for me- a huge eye opener to my heart- I was asked, "Have you forgiven yourself?" Wow. That stopped me in my tracks. "Why, no, I haven't." I said a prayer and got healed by letting go of the mistakes and unwise decisions I have made in the past -especially in the area of choosing to love men who won't love me back. My Dad wasn't around much growing up. Some of you know my story of being abandoned by two husbands- The last one broke my heart the most, because I can honestly say l love him the most. Heartache has been a painful journey, but God has been using it for good and has made me more beautiful because of it. I look at people differently. I know how to love unconditionally. To see others through Christ's eyes. I learned that a heart wanting to be loved is what we all crave. I learned you can't make someone love you. You can't make them stay, you can't make them keep their word or make them change. They have to choose themselves if they are going to love, stay, forgive, or walk away. I overcame something this week. I stopped chasing after affection. I gave up on man and realized it's pointless to try to get love from someone. One thing about passionately pursuing Jesus is that He pursues us too. He doesn't reject our love and He doesn't abandon. He loves us regardless. I noticed a lot of physical changes. My skin is just as smooth as butter- super silky!!! I tried on old clothes and they fit better and look better. I have to say I think my favorite body part right now would be my butt :) It's looking cute. I'm almost laughing at that, but it's true. My skin is golden from the tanning I have done- This is my reward for working out at the gym. I started taking ROYAL JELLY 2-3 times a day. It has been giving me a boost. You are what you eat- so I must be royalty :). My hunger has changed, and I don't just mean food. I'm into the Word more. I'm hungrier for spending time in His presence. Good changes...You can never get too much of GOD. :) I have been pushing my workouts more. It's good.

Being Pushed

Wow is all I can say, and thank you, God, that you're bringing changes to my life. I sometimes don't like to say the word "surrender" because it seems scary with the unknown that follows. My heart has been crying out for help in the areas that I need changing. There's plenty of need for change. Poppa God is pushing me out of my comfort zone, toward things He placed on my heart years ago: callings and gifts He has blessed me with. For so long I have been on an invisible shelf, collecting the dust of days going by. I'm sure part of it was just the process of growth and refining my character, but now that I have been stepping out into the water, I feel myself being dusted off by God and underneath the grime of disappointments, rejections of others, and insecurities. I find myself being made shiny and new -even pretty. It's something I felt I had lost, but I'm now realizing it was there all along, I just couldn't see it. I have gotten my music back, my singing in the Holy Spirit back, prophetic words and songs back, and I feel Him pushing me to start using those gifts and talents again. Scary, but fantastically cool. I just have to remember that He is with me. He is with me in all I do for Him. I'm not alone in this, and you're not alone in this -in what God has for you to do. God is with you as you step out in faith and allow yourself to be vulnerable to others. I see prayers being answered in my ministry of fighting for marriages and families. I see prayers being answered in my personal life as well -things I just about gave up on are coming forth. Wow, God! Sometimes I think we feel stuck in a dark, dank dungeon, and we can't ever get out, but sometimes I think Poppa God has already removed our shackles, but we don't notice. We're like elephants, who even though they are no longer chained and staked to the ground, won't go past the invisible line, because off their memory of being restrained. I must go past the length of chain I once was restrained by, and I hear Poppa God say, "You're free. You are truly free. MOVE"

I am hoping for and expecting the rest of the resources and tools I need to move forward into what God has called me to. A music team that flows in the spirit to prophetic songs. It will happen -courage and bravery to speak to the ladies at the women's retreat coming up -healing for my body. I'm praying and fasting this week. I've got to get away and hide in the cleft of the rock. I want to see His face more. That's the thing with His presence- it gets addictive, and there's nothing else that satisfies, but His LOVE. I pray all of you who are on your journey of transformation- you are "FREE" and you must walk past that barrier line that you have had for so long. There's so much more for you than you could ever comprehend. "You are free Oh, Daughter! Free!" Love ya gals, and I'm expecting to hear from you about what God is doing in your hearts, lives and bodies. Next level!!!

Changes: Week 3 (90 Day Challenge of Transformation)

I won't lie, this third week was hard. It took me all week to even write it- forgive me...

...but I did see changes in my character, and also my body. I went and tried clothes on and was gleefully delighted as they glided on easily. I fought frustration and physical pain, because the weather hasn't been favorable to me. Also my ministry was attacked. Blahh is how I felt some of this past week, but I came through the tests with grace and I feel there is growth, Praise God! I have learned that you just have to keep moving forward, even if it feels like there aren't any results. A couple of days do matter when eating healthy and exercising. I love my friends in the challenge and family who have supported me. This whole experience has been VERY challenging. I am not one who usually is naturally disciplined so for me to lead a group of ladies on this 90 day expedition has been humbling and has caused me to learn to follow through. Some of the gals didn't like a picture I posted of a woman who was smiling with her flaws showing. I felt it was healing, so I just pushed aside my desire to people please, and did what I felt was right. Wow, It was huge for me!!!! I will not always please man, but I must strive to Please GOD. That is what matters and He smiles and approves, not because I deserve it, but because He is LOVE and GRACE. I am getting thinner and my skin is looking fabulous, but inside I'm getting stronger too. I am His daughter and He loves me. Knowing this and walking in this daily is my desire. A Queen knows her place and her authority as she submits to Christ her KING. We are truly becoming a queen after the heart of our King.

Poppa's Baby Girl By The Sea

I love the ocean. It's always a special place to me. I feel so little standing next to the massive sea. I sense God's power and beauty as I hear the waves crashing and lapping over my feet, enjoying the smell of the air and how clean it makes me feel. Truly God is everywhere, but I feel closest to Him at the beach. Sometimes I go here to find emotional healing and to clear my head of all the muck. There are no distractions, just His beauty and power. The aches of my heart have been many. Sometimes it feels this season will never end. I get strong some days, I think I'm finally better and then a memory or a song will send me crashing down like a sneaker wave. Great is His faithfulness! When I am overcome with grief -yet My Lord is with me and I make it through another piece of my broken vessel. There is purpose and a tangible plan that our Maker has when He is taking the pieces of our heart and fusing them back together. There is beauty even when there have been ashes. His love has so many levels -so deep, so vast, so wide, so mysteriously amazing. I can never fully comprehend His love. It's endless, just like the view of a horizon at sea -you see no end to it. Sometimes I feel so unworthy, so unlovable, so unvaluable, but they are lies, and just because I feel that way for the moment doesn't mean it's truth. What is constant? What is true? His love and mercy, grace and justice are as sure as the ocean tide coming in. I don't always see the end of this process. As I was walking on the wet sand and water was swirly around my ankles, I began to sink and I whispered, "I feel afraid, Poppa." He said to me so quietly, but so clearly: "You will not sink as long as you keep moving". I remember that day like a permanent fixture burned on my heart. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and move forward. I wrote all my cares and concerns of my heart on rocks with a sharpie pen and I prayed over each one of them and then I threw them into the sea. "Here, Poppa God. You can have it all."

Becoming A Woman Of Prayer

Becoming A Woman Of Prayer

Living a lifestyle of prayer is important. It makes your spiritual walk and personal relationship with God grow closer. Prayer to me is just like talking to an individual. I say anything that's on my mind and heart to Poppa God (my personal name I call God). He knows our thoughts even before we speak them. He enjoys spending time with us.

To fast is to give up something that is valuable to you for a time in order to devote yourself to prayer and the Lord's service. Many forgo food. Some may give up using the Internet or other media. Really, you can choose anything that would be distracting or take up a lot of your time -time that you could be using instead to be fellowshipping with the Lord. PLEASE NOTE: If you have medical conditions such as diabetes that would require you to have a certain diet- I HIGHLY recommend talking to your physician first before giving up food. You can always just fast sweets and chocolate or anything pleasurable. I believe God honors the heart more than the sacrifice. Just do what you can to spend more time with God.

As mothers, wives, workers, ministers, etc., we know how busy life is. You may not have enough hours in a day to just be on your knees praying, but you DO HAVE minutes; and praying in intervals throughout the day can easily add up to horus. Five minutes of prayer is better than none. JUST BE LOOKING FOR OPPORTUNITIES AND BE PRAYER MINDED. Here are a few examples and ideas that I have found that work for incorporating more prayer and Bible reading time:

■In the shower or while taking a bath.
■while putting your makeup on or doing your hair (I talk to God a lot while doing this)
■Restroom breaks
■In the car while driving somewhere. even if you have small children in the car you can do this -praying out loud in front of your kids is good for them. They listen and they learn from you.
■In lieu of a TV program: Turn the TV off. How many hours do you normally watch programs? Use some of this time for prayer instead.
■In the waiting rooms of doctors offices or school appointments
■When stopped at a red light or waiting for traffic to clear
■While working out at the gym or on a walk (I talk to God a lot during those times).
■While cooking dinner (the best tacos are made while worshipping God or praying).
■In lieu of a nap (trust me, you will be more refreshed and energized by spending time with GOD than you would with sleeping)
■While cleaning or vacuuming (I spent lots of times talking to God while doing this).
■Lunch breaks at work or school

These are just a few ideas, but see? There are more than enough opportunities for us to spend time in prayer with GOD.

A few tips I have found helpful when fasting:

■Don't try to give up your normal cup of coffee in the morning. You don't want to start your fast with a headache. If you decide that you want to give up caffeine, do it gradually -such as one cup the first day, a half cup the next day, etc., until you have slowly eliminated your intake.
■Drink plenty of water and keep hydrated.
■If you're giving up meat, you can eat mushrooms, beans, eggplant, etc. These are good alternatives, and you still will get some protein in your body.
■Nutritional shakes that contain vitamins are helpful if you are skipping meals.
■Keep away from the media.TV, Internet, Radio, etc. Whatever keeps your focus away form meditating on the Word.
■Keep your house an atmosphere of worship. Play worship music, light candles, etc. This makes it inviting for peace and quiet.
■Include your children in prayer and Bible reading. This brings everyone together.
■Be searching, reflective, and repentant. Ask God what areas of your heart and life need to be dealt with. This leaves room in your heart for MORE OF GOD.
■Meditate on the WORD. Place scriptures on your wall, mirrors, or places where you will see them often.
■Keep your Bible handy as well as paper and pen. Then when something speaks to you, you can write it down.

These are just a few ideas to get you started. Remember to forgive yourself if you blow it one day. This isn't supposed to be legalistic or used as a tool to heap condemnation on yourself. IT'S THE HEART THAT MATTERS MORE THAN THE SACRIFICE.

~Jenny Williams