31 Days of Walking In Wisdom (Day 1)

As I was praying for women and their marriages, I felt in my heart that there had to be more than just prayer alone. Prayer is essential, but I believe that there should be action with faith as well. I asked God, "Please show me how to get the keys to a man's heart." Many wives have found their husbands have locked the door of the hearts from their wives. RESPECT AND HONOR is what men need and desire. If they don't have this from their wife- Their walls go up. Getting wisdom and understanding is the key to unlock solutions to problems. Please join us for the month of October: 31 Days of Walking in Wisdom. Every day we will be reading a chapter of Proverbs. Wisdom truly is the key to unlock solutions to the problems you may have in your life. ♥ Day 1: Read chapter 1 of Proverbs: Reflect: What have you found wisdom to be ? What does wisdom provide ? Proverbs chapter 1 and footnotes are from NIV Version Bible Purpose and Theme 1 The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel: 2 for gaining wisdom and instruction; for understanding words of insight;3 for receiving instruction in prudent behavior, doing what is right and just and fair;4 for giving prudence to those who are simple,[a] knowledge and discretion to the young—5 let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance—6 for understanding proverbs and parables, the sayings and riddles of the wise.[b] 7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools[c] despise wisdom and instruction. Prologue: Exhortations to Embrace WisdomWarning Against the Invitation of Sinful Men 8 Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.9 They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck. 10 My son, if sinful men entice you, do not give in to them.11 If they say, “Come along with us; let’s lie in wait for innocent blood, let’s ambush some harmless soul;12 let’s swallow them alive, like the grave, and whole, like those who go down to the pit;13 we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder;14 cast lots with us; we will all share the loot”—15 my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths;16 for their feet rush into evil, they are swift to shed blood.17 How useless to spread a net where every bird can see it!18 These men lie in wait for their own blood; they ambush only themselves!19 Such are the paths of all who go after ill-gotten gain; it takes away the life of those who get it. Wisdom’s Rebuke 20 Out in the open wisdom calls aloud, she raises her voice in the public square;21 on top of the wall[d] she cries out, at the city gate she makes her speech: 22 “How long will you who are simple love your simple ways? How long will mockers delight in mockery and fools hate knowledge?23 Repent at my rebuke! Then I will pour out my thoughts to you, I will make known to you my teachings.24 But since you refuse to listen when I call and no one pays attention when I stretch out my hand,25 since you disregard all my advice and do not accept my rebuke,26 I in turn will laugh when disaster strikes you; I will mock when calamity overtakes you—27 when calamity overtakes you like a storm, when disaster sweeps over you like a whirlwind, when distress and trouble overwhelm you. 28 “Then they will call to me but I will not answer; they will look for me but will not find me,29 since they hated knowledge and did not choose to fear the Lord.30 Since they would not accept my advice and spurned my rebuke,31 they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes.32 For the waywardness of the simple will kill them, and the complacency of fools will destroy them;33 but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm.” Footnotes: 1.Proverbs 1:4 The Hebrew word rendered simple in Proverbs denotes a person who is gullible, without moral direction and inclined to evil. 2.Proverbs 1:6 Or understanding a proverb, namely, a parable, / and the sayings of the wise, their riddles 3.Proverbs 1:7 The Hebrew words rendered fool in Proverbs, and often elsewhere in the Old Testament, denote a person who is morally deficient. 4.Proverbs 1:21 Septuagint; Hebrew / at noisy street corners

Key To A Man's Heart

Wives, one thing Poppa God has been speaking to me about as a solution for some women, is learning how to find the key to a man's heart -specifically your man. Many husbands, for various reasons, have shut the doors of their hearts toward their wives and locked them. They feel they have been dishonored or disrespected. Their pride has been hurt, and their fear of failure has been amplified because their wives have lost sight of how to show their love and respect in a Godly way. Having access to your husband's heart again can open opportunities for healing in your marriage if it's strained. Prayer is important, always continue to pray. This will bring the kind of wisdom that will reveal a solution. James 1:5 "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you."  Be careful. It's possible to pray and pray until you are blue in the face, but get nowhere in repairing your marriage. First, do some reflection and think about your actions. Try and remember the tone or words you have used when speaking with your husband. Think about if you, out of frustration or anger, have dishonored or disrespected him. How do you make your husband feel in your presence? Do ridicule him, belittle him, or criticize his efforts? Do you nag and complain about your home, money, car, or any other thing your husband has worked for to provide you and your children with? Have you talked dirt about him behind his back? Have you made remarks such as "You always do this!", or "You never do that!" Have you publicly made jokes about your husband in front of others? Even if your husband laughed it off, it may have hurt him deeper than you realized. These things tear husbands down. Men were created to feel honored and respected. This is how God made them. A man who feels undervalued, unappreciated, and degraded will look for validation elsewhere if you, as a wife, have not provided this for him. What may seem like little comments, valid complaints, etc., may have gotten him to build that wall around his heart, brick by brick. The injury of a man's pride is really his manhood being stripped away. Over time, these things can cause his heart to be hardened, and his walls to go up. A husband will grow tired of feeling low about himself as a man. When a man feels emotionally connected with a woman, he will desire to be near her and to stay by her side. This is why a man will sometimes go after another woman and have an affair, because she knows how to touch his heart emotionally and she makes him feel good about himself. It's not always about sex, or that the other woman is prettier than you -it's how she makes him feel, but there are always solutions to life's problems. Simply put, YOU need the key to HIS heart! As Dr. Mike Murdock states:  "Men desire to have a 'nest' with no thorns." As wives, we should create our homes to be a safe refuge from the "thorns" of life.   Proverbs 14:1 "The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." In other words, your words and your actions have a large part in creating the environment of your home and marriage. I share this not to place blame, or to help make excuses as to why a husband has walked away. I know that you most likely feel that you have valid reasons for the actions, reactions, and words you may have said to him at times -he may have disappointed you or hurt your feelings too, but it takes two to build a healthy marriage, and you knowing your role as a wife will help. If you can walk in wisdom and apply God's principles of how to show honor and respect, it can help immensely. I must say, search your heart and ask God if this might be something you have unknowingly done. Please know that I share from experience and my own personal failures. I encourage wives to ask the Lord to help tear down the walls that have been built, and begin learning to build up your husbands with new found honor and respect. Find the key to his heart so YOU can unlock the door. Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved Please feel free to share for encouragement purposes only. God bless.
(Quoted scriptures are from the NIV Bible Translation.)

Encouragement For Husbands

Husbands, have you lost the art of romancing your wife? Has it been a while since you've experienced passion in your relationship? Is it cold...like a fridge...in the bedroom? Does your wife turn you down intimately? Women were created and wired to be cherished and feel secure in their relationship with their husbands. Do you cherish her? She needs to feel this from you. When she does, she responds to your sexual needs, because she will feel emotionally connected to you. Sex starts outside of the bedroom for a woman. Let me repeat that one... sex starts outside of the bedroom for a woman! She needs to feel valued, and not as a sexual object or conquest. She needs to feel she is beautiful to you. She needs to be touched and caressed outside of the bedroom. She needs to be wined and dined. Do you make the effort to continue to court her (date her) even after the wedding day?  This is a forever thing that husbands need to do for their wives. Ephesians 5:28 "In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself." Have you given her a special gift just for the sake of making her smile? Have you danced with her in the living room? Reflect on this: what did you do to win her heart before you were married? A wise man knows that the responsibility of a husband is to romance her every day. This is "cherishing" her. She needs to know she is your prize that you love. She needs to know that you value her. Some guys have a hard time being romantic, but there are always ideas in books, on the internet, etc. If you have neglected this area in your marriage, ask God for wisdom on how to warm your wife's heart again. Ask Him to give you the key to her heart. Wisdom is available for you. Start romancing her with little unexpected things. Show her your love. Woo her heart again. Don't bring up the past, just make the future better. It's the little things a man does that capture a woman's heart. God has the solutions. Read the book "Song of Solomon" in the Bible. It's a blueprint for romance. God made women with a need to feel cherished and romanced. If you haven't told her she's beautiful in a while, tell her again -and again. If she comes back with a nasty comment or remark, ignore it. Somehow along the way her heart was injured and her walls went up. Most likely because she felt undervalued and that she was no longer cherished, but there is hope. Be gently persistent, because she may no longer be used to being romanced by you. If you keep finding creative ways to encourage her with your acts of kindness and love, she will melt for you again. Song of Solomon 1:2-3 "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— for your love is more delightful than wine. Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out." Praying for you, men. Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives, Copyright 2012. All rights reserved. Please enjoy and feel free to share for encouragement purposes only. Scriptures are from NIV Bible translation.

A Love Letter to All Brides

To the Bride who doesn't feel loved anymore...to the Bride who feels lost and alone in her marriage...to the Bride who feels like she is holding her family together alone...to the Bride who has been betrayed by the one she loves...to the Bride who has received the ultimate betrayal: being traded for another woman...to the Bride who soaks her pillow with tears every night...to the Bride who keeps a brave smile on her face even though every day is a struggle to get through...to the Bride who feels she can't ask for help because she feels embarrassment and shame...to the Bride who wonders, "What's wrong with me and why doesn't he love me anymore? What did I do wrong?"...to the Bride who feels her fairy tale dreams have been shredded to pieces along with her heart...to the Bride who has been lied to, cheated on, used, or abused...to the Bride who feels like she is competing with her husband's addictions: alcohol, drugs, pornography, or gambling -and waits to be loved more than these things...to the Bride who has tried everything to fix her marriage and feels tired and weary...to the Bride who receives no love or affection from the man who promised to be her lover, friend, protector, and provider...to the Bride who feels uncherished, unvalued, or unromanced...to the Bride who is facing unwanted divorce or separation from the love of her life...to the Bride who has been verbally abused with cruel words spoken so harshly, she feels like she can't escape from the pain of the words that have become thorns in her heart...to the Bride who worries about how to pay the bills or put food on the table for her children...to the Bride who struggles daily with physical pain and illness but still tries to make the best of it...to the Bride whose husband has had to leave her to serve his country, and she doesn't know if her soldier is ever coming back...to the Bride who doesn't feel good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, sexy enough, or strong enough -the answer is really so simple, beloved. A beautiful Bride you will always be to Jesus, and He wants you to know this: He understands your pain, your struggles, and your tears. He has been broken and betrayed by those He loved. He was beaten, abused, forgotten, and ridiculed. He knows, and He wants to hold you and carefully, gently heal your wounded heart. He loves you not based on what you do or don't do, He sees you as His beautiful, stain-free, spotless bride. He loves you...always. He won't leave you or abandon you. He will wipe your tear stained face, and He will not forget. "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book" Psalms 56:8. You are treasured in His heart and He sees you as the "Apple of His Eye". He celebrates you, He adores you, He cares for you, and He will be there for you. Let Him hold you when no one else will. Beloved, you are His Bride for eternity. These present circumstances will fade away, but His love for you will remain the same. "For I know the plans I have for  you." says the Lord, "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope ." Jeremiah 29:11. Written By Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved. Please feel free to share for encouragement purposes only. God bless.

This is My Prayer For You

bear with me

trying to iron out some kinks

Season Of Change

Have you been through the dark valley? Have you been in a drought of joy or peace? Have you suffered a season of brokenness and tears? Has it seemed to last so long that you feel like it's never going to change? There is a time for all seasons under heaven to change. Your time will come. My life is proof of this. I went through a very long dark night of the soul and I have found His grace has sustained me and brought me through. I wrote this spontaneous song in the shower:

He gives me His song of deliverance, His love song of praise. 

He will give you one too. Hold on, Beloved. 

Your time of joy will come, I'm praying for you.

The season of change is here, Love surrounding me..

 His joy has been my strength.

 The pain and suffering are like leaves that are falling 

and all that is left are Your promises that remain. 

In You I have found that I have nothing lacking. 

In You I have all that I have ever need of. 

The wind of Your spirit is swirling around me

 blowing away all the pain and the shame.. 

Your love is sweet and thick on me like honey,

 and dripping is Your mercy and favor on my face. 

 Your grace -double grace is now falling like rain. 

All those who misunderstood and perhaps misjudged me 

are blessing me in your glorious name. 

Through it all I have found You to be faithful and true. 

The air is sweet and Your breath I feel in this place. 

In the dark night You walked me through. 

You never left my side.

Jesus, Your joy is mine and I'm forever grateful and dancing this time.

 My tears are dried and my suffering is falling like leaves and are blown away

and all that is left are your promises that remain. Copyright 2012, Jenny Williams.

Words Are Powerful- What Are you Saying?

Psalm 19:14 "May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer." One of the greatest pieces of wisdom that can change things is knowing how much power is in your words. What you speak to yourself, your husband or wife, your children and even to your situations, can and will come to be. Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit." Everything God accomplishes is by speaking. There are many scriptures in the Bible about this very thing. What you speak will come to pass, whether good or bad, so choose wisely. Ephesians 4:29 "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." At the end of our lives every idle word we have spoken will be taken accounted for. 1 Samuel 2:3 "Do not keep talking so proudly or let your mouth speak such arrogance, for the LORD is a God who knows, and by him deeds are weighed." WOW. How many idle words have I spoken in my life? When you are upset with your spouse do you say things like, "You never listen to me... You always..." These words are negative seeds and yes, they will grow and produce a fruit. Job 15:6 "Your own mouth condemns you, not mine; your own lips testify against you."  Psalm 119:103 "How sweet are Your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!"  Proverbs 4:24 "Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips."  Proverbs 6:2 "you have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth." So, dear friends, remember to always be mindful of what you say. Psalm 119:43 "Never take Your word of truth from my mouth, for I have put my hope in Your laws." 

Reflecting back (God Was Here The Whole Time)

I was reading over some of my old writings and came across this one. So much has happened since that day. I remember how broken and raw I was back then, after my husband of nearly 13 years walked out on God and me. I have come a long way. Poppa God has done so much heart surgery on me. Reading this old post reminds me of His faithfulness and the strength He has been to me all this time. I'm no longer heartbroken. I no longer feel the need to have the attention of any man. Instead, I feel contentment. I feel humbled and honored and happy to be helping others on their journeys of healing as well. As I surrendered my heart's desires on the altar, He placed an all consuming passion to encourage wives daily; to stand in the gap in prayer for them, and to share the wisdom and treasures I have gathered along the way. His love for marriage has been a blazing fire in my heart. God has been so good to me even through the thousands of tears I've shed. He is faithful. Now our ministry is growing, marriages are being healed, lives are being transformed, and all I can say is to God be the glory and oh, how all this pain and suffering has been worth it in the end. I can't wait to share my entire story -to encourage other women and let them know that God is in control and that He makes everything beautiful in His timing -even the ashes of our lives, the mistakes we make, and the struggles we've endured. Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. 

September 24 2010 "ME" by Jenny Williams:  I am.. silly, funny, loving, creative, sweet, passionate. I want.. to make a positive difference in people's lives, to love and be loved, to live the potential God has created in me. I have.. the best friends, the most incredible family, and a God who never fails. I wish.. that I didn't have to go through this season of my life. I hate.. judgmental people, disappointing someone, selfishness, seeing children abused or neglected. I fear.. not being able to accomplish what I was meant to do, being rejected again. I hear.. the sound of country music in my head. I search.. for the answers to my "whys", but know I won't get them. I wonder.. if God really has a plan for me in all of this. I wonder about the "what ifs". I regret.. I choose to not regret, but to learn life's lesson from this journey I'm on. I love.. my beautiful kids, my true friends, my family, and My Lord and Savior. I ache.. to be held, to be comforted, for this pain to go away. I ache for brighter days. I ache for someone I love. I always.. choose God. I may mess up, I may stumble, I may get lost sometimes -I'll never be perfect, but I'll always belong to God. I usually.. notice the little things: sights, smells, sounds, textures... I experience everything. I am not.. I may be broken and hurt right now, BUT I'M NOT DESTROYED, and I will be stronger and better than before. I dance.. in the rain, when snow flakes are falling, in my living room with my babies. I sing.. in the shower, to my kids, to the ones I love, in the car, silly and out of tune..lol. I never.. want to be hurt again like this. I rarely.. refuse to help someone who is hurting or needs encouragement. I cry.. a lot lately -morning, noon, and night, but it's getting better. I never thought a human could have so many tears. I am not always.. going to hurt like this. It will get better. I lose.. my self confidence when I place it in other people's hands, may I never do that again! I've discovered something in all of this: I like myself -I love myself -I like who I am; my quirky personality, my curvy body, I like myself the way I am. If I'm not good enough for a man than too bad for him. I'm confused.. as to why he doesn't love me anymore. I need.. to keep moving, keep living, keep loving, keep trusting God. I can do this. I should.. be thankful for every blessing, every prayer, every blissful moment, because in a moment it can all be lost or taken away. I dream.. of seeing my dreams fulfilled, brokenness turned whole, with love and laughter.

One Of Those Days

Sometimes I just want comfort, because the ache of missing someone is so great. I just don't want to get out of bed, because the thoughts haunt and linger like an old friend, and I wonder if they remember me. Sometimes I just don’t want to fake a smile, because the emotions are just way too close to the surface and it feels like I’m truly at the breaking point of a tear slipping down. No, thank you. I have come this far. So I just want to eat some chocolate, or maybe a comforting gourmet cheese sandwich with soup; but please, please don’t drag me anywhere. I’m just tired, very tired. I know this temporary feeling will pass just like a quick little rain shower. I’m not going backward, I refuse to do that. I’m going forward, if only someone could hold me and not say a word. Written by Jenny Williams, Ruby Wives Copyright 2012. All rights reserved.

"Don't Have Love" (Official Music Video) - Christian singer Holly Starr:...

Jason Mraz - I Won't Give Up (Lyric Video)