Silly, funny, loving, quirky, sweet and passionate
To make a positive difference in people's lives. To love and be loved. To live out the potential God has for me.
The best friends, the most incredible family, and a God who never fails.
I didn't have to go through this season in my life. Single life is hard.
I strongly dislike judgmental people, disappointing someone, selfishness, seeing children abused or neglected, and when men only desire a woman for her body.
not being able to accomplish what I was meant to do, or being rejected again.
The sound of country music...it's in my blood, my heart and soul- I must be a true southern in the way I'm wired..lol.
For the answers to my "whys", but know I won't get them.
If God really has a plan for me and my kids in all this, about the "what ifs", and if I will ever be loved again.
I choose to not regret...but learn from life's lessons of this journey I'm on.
My beautiful kids, my true friends, my family and my Lord and Savior- Jesus.
To be held...to be comforted. I ache for this pain to go away. I ache for brighter days. I ache to be loved forever with a pure love. To be a wife, lover, companion, a soul mate.
Choose GOD. I may mess up, I may stumble, I may get lost sometimes, I'll never be perfect, but I always belong to God....my Poppa :)
Notice the little things: sights, smells, sounds, textures. I experience everything.
I am not:
I may be feeling lonely and hurt right now, but I'm not destroyed, and I will be stronger and better than before. I'll take this pain and use it for good for someone else down the road.
In the shower, to my Heavenly Father -Poppa, the ones I love, in the car silly and not in tune..lol.
In the rain, when snowflakes are falling, and in my living room with my babies.
Want to hurt again like this.
Refuse to help someone who is hurting or needs encouragement.
silent tears...especially at night. It's a lonely road right now. I never thought a human could cry so many tears.
I am not always:
Going to hurt like this. It will get better, right?
My self confidence when I place it in other people's hands; never again. I discovered something in all this. I like myself -I love myself. I like who I am: my quirky personality and my curvy body, I like me the way I am. If I ain't good enough for a man, then too bad for him.
As to why someone doesn't love me anymore.
To keep moving, keep living, keep loving, and keep trusting Poppa. I can do this.
Be thankful for every blessing, every prayer, every blissful moment...because in a moment it can all be lost or taken away.
Of seeing my dreams fulfilled, a diamond transformed from my brokenness, a bright sunny day on a beach saying vows that last forever to the one who will love me in return.
By Jenny Williams. Copyright 2010